purposely deprive myself of sleep

yeah, i did it last night-today, whatever. and i terribly tired right now. but i have to stay wake for 24 hours!

2:30. When I can sleep.

Anyways, the whole night I watched a kdrama, downloaded a movie, and at 5:15 i went out for a bike ride. Craziest shit i have ever done. And i’m pretty proud of myself for my self-control.

the highlight of my day:EMW

thats how pathetic my days are now. i wake up at 2 everyday. sleep at 4 every morning. and I lounge around my house the entire day. today, at 8:30 i went to EMW Tea co. with denora. and frankly, I have been wanting to go there because i always hear people talking about how much fun they have playing the wii. i’m not a gamer, per se. but i like to try. i actually got 7th place but that was because i had luck with those boost thingys–i always got the bullet. anyway, the guy that works there is the infamous ap lit vid guy and it was pretty funny watching him. for some reason he was smiling the whole time. maybe the excitement from the game was too much to subdue or the EMW people trained him super well. haha.

oh and i really need to start drinking chai and tea because i don’t like anything there. i need broaden my [beverage] horizons.

denny’s at 3 am

anything open 24 hours a day is just an incentive for youngster to be out.

denora, sam, and i established we will, one day, go to denny’s randomly and hopefully sponataneously. of course, spontaneous wouldn’t work because all three of us are uber-lazers, especially myself since i have a late bedtime. most likely, i will be the person to call since i would be awake and set up the whole rendezvous.

so let’s see. maybe within the next two weeks?

today, instead, at three am i stole the webcam and giffed myself. sorry, its frightening.

Capsule-Get Down

i’m a high school graduate

yeah, i finally graduated on Thursday. well, it’s not exactly anything i’m proud of since i can no longer say i’m a high school senior. at least i still have 6 months ahead of me till my birthday. after that, everything is gonna go downhill since i’m not ready for adulthood nonetheless college life.

graduation was fine. my only regret was not smiling enough, smiling too much, and not taking enough pictures with people i’m most likely never gonna see again.

the whole practicing wasn’t as elaborate and perfected as they said it would be. i made mistakes and almost everyone else did, as well. i thought i had it down except for the exact pivoting of the foot in the stands. that seriously was difficult. i practiced outside of claim jumper the same day after my friends had taught me. and from then that scared the shit out of me, that i could possibly fall if i’m not careful and wear high heels. yeah, so i ruined my ensemble and wore these ultra-tiny and hideous shoes [my mom's] and i was self-conscious the whole time. the goddamn shoes resulted in a bloodfest after i took them off.

sorry. i should write more about the graduation, itself. but right now is not the time. some day.

sober grad was okay. nothing too fun. bowling, ddr, and chips and salsa. oh and i won a $100. Seventy-five dollar benefit. at least i was a lucky one. i wish i won the wii or tv though.

my friend had taken me there so when we left and i got home at 4:30 in the morning, i found all the doors locked. very smart, parents. being indian, i would think they would be super protective and be awake till i came home. not this time, i guess. i slept at her house on an air mattress that kept deflated so i could feel my butt on the floor. and we woke up at 2 in the afternoon.

yesterday, i succumbed to the pressure from my parents and my friend and i went to an indian grad party. i haven’t been to those things for a very, very, VERY long time. it wasn’t bad but i was forced to dance. well, i attempted. something i have NEVER done since i was old enough to think on my own.

today, we had a family prayer. it was less of a prayer and more of a social gathering. these are the times when i realize how superficial my mom can be and everyone else just rude. no one was sincere during the whole thing. i mean if you call yourself Hindu and a devotee, then act like one and be respectful. shit. i consider myself a hindu at times of crisis. and this is the time. but maybe my parents imagined if we called shrastiji over and initiated the pooja then everything would be blissful in the future. no, parents, we’re smarter than that. you and i need a talk. we’re switching roles for the night.

searching my name

its a bit creepy, so stop.

political insignificance

i had one of those days where i had a chat with my bestie about everything. amusing but once there wasn’t enough to talk about that involved our superficial lives, we moved onto politics. i don’t know why. and as me being passive, i let her say what she wanted and kept my mouth shut, which i prefer because i don’t want anyone judging me off what i believe, which isn’t much at all. [sorry, mr. price but you failed on this gov student. my participation is a maybe.] but, soon after the convo went downhill.

we talked about elections and my support for obama or mccain. as of now, i wouldn’t fuss if mccain did win general elections–he’s a moderate republican. yeah, i was a huge obama fan but the hype has gone down for me. anyway, we established i was a moderate-leanings towards liberal and her, the other way. but mannn, some of the things she said was just terrible.

“go to some other country” if you don’t like the US? you must be kidding me. no, bestie. that isn’t the way to solve issues. and don’t forget, i’m sure many would leave due political instability if it were that easy. and that’s exactly the reason why so many are apt to change in the US. having pride is one thing and comparing this country to the rest is another. only because your parents lived in germany and greece for the military, doesn’t give you the right to say that our nation allows the most “freedom.” [i'm not saying that it doesn't, since i don't know.] sure, they didn’t have the best experience there but what does that say about equality? nothing at all. you don’t know enough about other countries to judge. and price of living in other countries compared to the US has nothing to do with anything. to us, the US might be cheaper but if we lived in Europe the prices would seem normal because that’s what we would be used to. For example, Scandinavians normally wouldn’t think everything is expensive in SCANDINAVIA because the economy works proportionally. Just as we do. Well, not so much now since we’re in recession.

again, she complained about one of her good friends that annoyed her everytime they talked about politics. Uber liberal, i’m assuming. she had the point that this girl was against mccain for something he said about Iran, being irrelevant to something else[ i have no idea nor did she] and this was her reason for being against mccain. and my bestie basically said that this girl was closed-minded towards mccain because she favored middle easterners, which i personally don’t mind. but totally contradictory coming from her, since she’ll only vote republican, because she ummm….favors them. at least have some cause. not because they’re republican.

i hope she noticed my mocking looks. i kept a lean smile hoping she would notice i didn’t agree.

grad nite disneyland

fun night but exhausting. from nine to six am….i think that’s crazy and i am pretty proud of myself for actually staying awake the whole time. i actually thought a lot of people would be sleeping but everyone was resting by the end of of trip. i think my group and i did pretty well compared to others. tower of terror, space mountain, and indiana jones. we went on smaller ones too, but they’re insignificant. again, it was a fun night.

what’s so weird about dancing in the rain

do you really find it weird? maybe you’re too old to understand the significance of doing something so bizarre that it seems natural for a seventeen year old. i’m sure for many, getting drunk or smoking hookah is the norm but i can’t imagine doing that in the next six months so instead i fulfill i need for some fun by going out in my backyard and just doing it.

how often do you eat baby food?

apparently, Loren had the revelation to go out and buy some baby food. her excuse: to get a bottle for her buttons.

hahaha.

so today was our last official day of high school and i’m glad that i didn’t miss it. suprisingly there were quite a number of seniors in my classes. of course, the number went downhill after lunch and i saw only a handful during sixth period. lunch was decent. i drove to sonic so that sort of made me happy. but i’ve noticed that i’ve been moody lately and much of that involved cursing.

anyway, after school we went to saenal’s. and honestly, that wasn’t much fun but relaxing at the minimal. after that we decided to get food. everyone wanted crepes from the crepe factory but me being the picky person i am and after trying terrible crepes made by someone in my lit class, i didn’t even want to consider crepes. so i ordered pick up stix, which everyone got since the crepes were supposedly sour and warm. and guess what? i obviously ordered my vegetable chow mein and told the guy on the line my name, and he’s like “your sameet’s sister.” i don’t know why that had any significance, maybe because i had my occasional crush on him [an old friend of my brothers] whenever he came over. so i was surprised to see him there. it was nice. i had forgotten his eyes.

yeahh, so the chow mein was great. and so was the company. i don’t know how we got on the topic but loren tells us about how she tried baby food. and we were totally dumbfounded. her reason was inexcusable. so i had get her to try it again. so afterwards, we went to savemart, bought some gerbers oatmeal and mac and cheese. let me tell you,

THE MOST DISGUSTING THING I HAVE EVER TASTED.

yeah, i tried it. i had to. and i somehow got the taste lodged up my nose so i could occasionally taste it when we were watching the orphanage.

but before we tried that, we inflated a huge raft and the five of us sat in the raft for over a half an hour, just floating in my pool.

i’m pretty proud of myself. the day beat my expectations. one of the bests.

i wanna cry

today was my last day of high school

and someone stole my camera…something i couldn’t afford but bought anyways. stupid photo class. could have used that money for my trip.